Click here for the timelapse video of the Dean’s Date festivities!

In the meantime, congratulations all for another Dean’s Date survived. While I didn’t manage to get any work done for finals these past 24 hours, I salute those who did.

Oh, and STEM folks/test-takers who have been watching the HUM/paper-writers struggle to meet their deadline? It’s now your turn.

-VC

4:14 PM – McCosh Courtyard

Posting through a sketchy WordPress app to bring you a quick look at how a line develops

-JW

4:02 PM – Last Stretch

Back at home my French mom always had us sing “La Marseillaise” on the way to school for encouragement the mornings we had big exams. I may or may not still hum the tune to myself as I walk to my finals-believe me, it works!-but I figured this could be the perfect pick-me-up in the final hour of this jour de gloire:

Aux Armes !

-LBMC

3:08 PM – PTL chillin’

Shout out to all seniors who defended their theses today! Sorry we’re not sorry Dean’s Date means nothing to us. Ahhh but we do remember those days of pain. PSA for those in need of caffeine for the final 2-hour stretch:

Infini-T, I will love you forever.

- AYS

2:50PM – Spelman

Nice of you to join us, GN. Funny you should mention affiliation gear…

It took me three years to get this sweater.

-VC

2:11 PM – My carrel, which will not exist next year

My friend BJ ’14 pointed out the unusual proliferation of eating club/Greek/Daily Princetonian/other affiliation sweatshirts over the last 24 hours, and when I looked around, he was right: Firestone was overgrown with Ivy. Last night I walked into the a room on B-floor and felt like I had stumbled into a misplaced and mistimed pickups pregame. I counted 4 on the bag-check line alone. Our current theory is this: on this very inauspicious day, when people are maxing out in all the “unwashed” and “strung-out” and “dry-skinned” and “bleary-eyed” categories, they need to retain some visible signifier that they’re desirable. No shame in that. These are trying times. But do realize we all look like poo anyway. Now throw on that mocha-stained TI pinny and pump out those last five-to-ten pages.

-GN

1:33PM – West Egg

For those who endured Baz Luhrmann’s long-awaited Great Gatsby film adaptation this past weekend, you might have felt the soundtrack was the only thing that kept you from strangling Tobey Maguire and his incessant hit-you-over-the-head-twice narration (and the flying text). So enjoy the FULL SOUNDTRACK HERE:

Featuring: Jay-Z, Beyoncé, Andre 3000, Lana Del Rey, Florence + The Machine, The xx, Gotye, Jack White, Sia, and (god forbid) Fergie.

-VC

12:42PM - EAS library, passive aggressively glaring at the whisper-talkers

When did Halls become so peppy? I think the Wa should do this with their hoagie wrappers, too. I swear, those hoagies speak to me: “Yes, honey, you can eat your stress away.”

Fire up those engines… and don’t try to cough up a lung. Photocred Zhan Okuda-Lim ’15.

-EL

12:00PM – Spelman

Noontime! Check out the Princeton Highsteppers killing it on the Today Show! And on DEAN’S DATE, what??

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

-VC

11:31 AM – reddit (no good can come of this)

Filed under “I couldn’t ask for a better end to my 10 year (off & on) relationship with college.”

For those who can’t read ProfessorScript: “I’ve been doing this now for over 15 years. This is the most interesting and well-written paper I’ve had yet. Very nice.”

Don’t you want your prof to scrawl these lovely words on your paper? THIS COULD BE YOU! Let’s GO!

-VC

10:14 AM – Firestone Library, Reading Room

Turn your Dean’s Date swag on right about now.

If music is the only thing that can get you through those final 6 pages of your Art History essay, here are two strong mixes to do the trick.

Le Matos – LE VENERDÌ MIXTAPE VOL. 75, THE MIXTAPE SIDE A, LA MIXTAPE DI ROSSO CORSA

KILL THEM WITH COLOUR – RHAPSODIC VOL. 4

-NDS

9:49 AM – EAS library

Hang in there guys! You can almost taste the summer. After you spend 12 hour working on your paper, you can spend 12 hours a day staring at excel sheets for J.P. Morgan. WOOHOO.

The Forbes Board asks: “What are you doing this summer?” #toolsftw

-EL

8:13 AM – Back from the dead

Time for me to deliver:

The Anonymous Dean’s Date Poster Maker(s) Strikes Again!

Striking more anger and anxiety in student’s hearts than the ghost of grade deflation, we sat down with a representative of the postermaker(s) (it is unclear if there is more than just one, or whether said rep. just enjoys referring to hirself in 1st plural) to learn more.

Ink: Is this some guerilla campaign of the Writing Center?
Anon: Check the Writing Center website––it’s fully booked during Reading Period. Why should they get people riled up about writing if their appointments are already maxed out? Nay, we have different allegiances. We are Legion (as in that widely-panned movie with Dennis Quaid), and there are many of us. We hide in shadows and fear the light and carry two pieces of fruit out of Wu because no mortal laws can hold us.

Ink: You mentioned in your previous interview that you are campaigning against glorified procrastination. Do you think Princeton students are any better/worse at this than other college students?
Anon: We can’t say, having never been students at other schools. We do think we all carry some sense of academic martyrdom for having come here over anywhere we could have gone. Subconsciously believing we would be hot stuff at a less-elite school while doing less work and having more sex might make us more resentful that we’re here grinding out papers and giving/receiving half-hearted OTPHJs.

Ink: Isn’t having all papers due on one day just a bad idea in terms of workload pacing?
Anon: Absolutely. But have you ever tried getting something changed at the highest levels of University bureaucracy? Dean of the College Valerie Smith would listen to you politely and then burst into laughter once you left her office, pausing between her great guffaws to guzzle champagne diluted with students’ tears. It’s easier to encourage healthier responses to shitty policies.

Ink: Do you think you’ve changed your message/tone since the last postering campaign?
Anon: We were a little more provocative last time because we wanted to get people thinking about their attitudes toward Dean’s Date work. This time we tempered that with some heartfelt support. There’s too much self-loathing going on already; we don’t want other-loathing as well.

Ink: When was the last time you stayed up all night?
Anon: We don’t sleep. Too many posters to staple.

Ink: Why anonymity?
Anon: We’re not the heroes Princeton deserves; we’re the ones that it didn’t ask for and vaguely despises.

5:24 AM – Surrealist hell hole

With no power outlets in any reasonable place, young Sondern takes what he’s given

-JR

4:45 AM – A state of caffeinated delirium

Still in Campus Club, a brave soul toils onward. There are only a few more hours until daybreak. Make them count.

Also, this: http://ohcrapitsdeansdate.ytmnd.com/

- AJS & JR

2:45 AM – Campus Club

Jeremy Cohen ’16 created a web application that simulates ‘Prince’ comments called PrinceBot. I honestly can’t tell if some of these are real or not. Here’s one of my favorites:

- AJS

2:29 – Frist
Kim Jong Will greets his subjects at Frist (apologies for the poor camera-handling)

-JR

2:10 – Lockhart

OK you. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. We’ve all been there, bro. But actually. All of us. This is part of the Princeton tradition.

Laser like you.

PTFO

Lol like Coca-Cola is keeping anyone awake right now.

Do it for tradition.

-NDS

1:35 – Holder

First of all, I’m super glad that I only just learned from that post below (thanks Dana!) about this whole being able to see online what washing machines and dryers are available. I guess I was a little bit late on the uptake on that one.

Second of all, Food for thought: Is Princeton’s Dean More Sadistic Than Other Deans?

Most other schools have what’s called Dean’s List, a nice list that you get put on if you do well each semester that generally comes along with congratulations and a slap on the back if you have nice parents. On the other hand, at Princeton we don’t have Dean’s List. Instead we get evil Dean’s Date, a campus-wide day of suffering. Unfortunately, with this comparison, Princeton loses.

- ONF

1:28 AM – Forbes

Apparently, Dean’s Date Eve (or is it technically Dean’s Date now because it’s after midnight? #itsallablur) is the ideal time to do laundry, as ALL of the machines and dryers in the Forbes Annex laundry room are currently available. This never happens. So you’ll plan next year’s Dean’s Date accordingly? Yeah, me neither.

-DB

1:11 AM – Late night fringe

Now that it’s sufficiently late enough in our programming and our younger viewers are no longer with us, it’s time to rehash a classic DCW ’11 Dean’s Date game:

Which ‘Dean’ Would You Date?

Taking the top three “dean” searches on google (which may surprise you), contestants are:

1) Dean Martin
Best known for: The Dean Martin Show, Rat Pack, crooning voice
Date-ability: His soothing voice might calm your nerves tonight as you write.

2) Dean McDermott
Best known for: Being married to Tori Spelling,
Date-ability: Not unless you want to be on his family reality show: Tori & Dean: Inn Love.

3) Dean Cain
Best known for: Being Superman in the 90s American tv series.
Date-ability: Ladies– he’s a Princeton man! A member of Cap & Gown eating club, History major, Class of ’88– he’s everything Susan Patton would have you want! And he’s SUPERMAN. WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?!

Winner: Dean Cain.

But we didn’t even try the google image search results for “Dean”:

Dean Winchester from Supernatural vs. Dean Baker (the economist) vs. Jeffrey Dean Morgan, aka poor woman’s Robert Downey Jr.

-VC

12:52 AM – Mini Firestone (aka my room)

I have accumulated so many books from the library in my room as a result of papers that I have decided to turn my quad into a mini Firestone. Anyone wishing to borrow books is welcome to stop by beginning at 10 AM tomorrow. I’ll be installing a prox swiper and hiring a book bag-checking security guard sometime this week. If you’re interested, be sure to submit an application.

To put the stack in context, that monitor in the background is 23 inches. And I actually plan on returning these books, unlike the 4 ninth grade history textbooks still sitting in my room (sorry Dr. Frank!).

- ONF

12:30AM – Isitdeansdate.com

Is it Dean’s Date Yet has finally changed to reflect the truth.

11:47 PM – Whitman “Library”

Shout out to this kid for doin’ what he wants. #DGAF

-JR

11:30PM – From the #DeansDate Twitterverse

I actually just imagined throwing my laptop out the window. Then taking a nice leap myself #deansdate #imcracking #sendhelp
— Gechi Flocka Flame (@OgechiKatrina) May 14, 2013

block quotes are the best thing ever invented #DeansDate #struggs #almostthere — Grace Singleton (@gracelton) May 14, 2013

Another successful writing endeavor in the books — extension of extension granted. #gradschool #deansdate #notafailure — Laura Singer (@laurafish1) May 13, 2013

Alright 24 hours. The final gauntlet of the year. IT IS A PRIVILEGE TO FIGHT #DeansDate
— pulkpulldoors(@pulkpulldoors) May 13, 2013

-VC

10:30 PM – Firestone Library

The notorious Princeton University Band just arrived in the atrium of Firestone Library to play a few tunes. We captured some video, brimming with aggression and angry stares. Check it out here:

- AJS

10:15 PM – Outside the Art Museum

And so goes the Band, disturbing all of those pissed off students in Marquand…

- ONF

10:01 PM – U-Store

It’s expected that Dean’s Date Eve proves particularly profitable for the U-Store. From chicken sandwiches to Reese’s Bars to that detergent that you suddenly realized you needed at the exact wrong time, the U-Store has got it all. Surprisingly, the U-Store doesn’t seem to prepare all too well for this evening of paper-induced food-stuffing.

As you can see from the pictures below, the U-Store has been hit pretty heavily by over-worked students. Particular favorites are 5-hour energies, chobani yogurts, water, and those over-priced colored liquids that I’m too scared to ever actually drink (I think some people call them “healthy water”).

The Chobani yogurts are all gone!

- ONF

9:55PM – Mah bed

If you’re cunt-punting (apologies, readers, I should have opted for the more culturally sensitive term, “bush-whacking”) yourself because you missed the Wafel & Dinges truck (like me), hopefully the midnight breakfasts at either Whitman or Rocky will sate you (10:30PM). In the meantime, I’m just gonna cry and look at all the waffles I can’t have.

-VC

9:38 PM – Stokes Library

Damn, that paper is looking fine tonight… said no one ever.

Here’s some better eye-candy for motivation.

-EL

9:32 PM – Frist

Seems legit…

-JR

8:58 PM – Butler College

For those of you who respond better to the ‘stick’ than to the ‘carrot’ motivational tactic, sophomore Liz Lian has taken the liberty of parodying the internet-famous Delta Gamma sorority president’s #insaneletter to whip us back into shape just in time.

She presents:

WE FUCKING SUCK SO FAR – DEAN’S DATE EDITION

“…I do not give a flying fuck, and your professors do not give a flying fuck, about how much you fucking go to the library. You had one and a half weeks to fuck around, and today is NOT, I fucking repeat NOT ONE OF THEM. These remaining days are about pulling your papers out of your ass, and that’s not fucking possible if you’re going to stand around and go to Starbucks and not write. Newsflash you stupid cocks: PAPERS DON’T WRITE THEMSELVES. Oh wait, DOUBLE FUCKING NEWSFLASH: WE’RE NOT GOING TO GET OUR PAPERS DONE IF WE FUCKING PROCRASTINATE, which by the way in case you’re an idiot and need it spelled out for you, WE FUCKING PROCRASTINATE A LOT SO FAR…”

Gogogo!

-LBMC

8:39 PM – Wafels and Dinges Truck at Campus Club

The line for the Wafels and Dinges food truck at Campus Club was maybe longer than that paper you have yet to finish writing (see below). The Students Event Committee hired the truck for an after-dinner pick-me-up. Or maybe “lay–me-down” is more appropriate…

One student: Mmmm. This. Is. So. Good. OMIGOD. SO GOOD. I think I may collapse. Is death by Wafel and Dinges a legitimate excuse for not finishing my Dean’s Date papers?

Unfortunately, I don’t think so.

-DB

8:25 PM – Campus Club

Study break? I guess I wasn’t the only one…

- JW

8:17 PM – Spelman

For those writing philosophy papers, a classic Monty Python sketch:

Hegel is arguing that the reality is merely an a prioriadjunct of non-naturalistic ethics, Kant, via the categorical imperative, is holding that ontologically it exists only in the imagination, and Marx is claiming it was offside.

-VC

8:04PM – Stokes Library

RA ’13 and CJ ’15 show you how real pros do Dean’s Date. UPC approves of the “2 hugs per hour rule.”

(As for my Dean’s Date headquarters, it’s a dark carrel deep, deep within Stokes, where only the bleary-eyed grad students wander and the only rule is, “Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.”)

-EL

7:46PM – Rocky-Mathey Library (blogging from afar)

There’s a bizarre-but-awesome pillow fortress set up in the Architecture building. Absolutely no idea why it exists, but I’m hoping to sleep in it one of these nights. Some pictures below courtesy of Michael Jiang ’13.

-CRM

6:24PM – sooo hungry

For some real(er) Dean’s Date writing tips, check out this email I got from my JP advisor on “Every Worst Expository Student Essay Ever.” Things to avoid include:

The Land Before Time Introduction:

Ever since dinosaurs roamed the earth, college students have started essays by crafting vague, generalizing first sentences that suggest, though not in a pushy or assertive way but, rather, vaguely, that the beginning of every argument, not to mention every attempt at scholarly narrative, should coincide with the beginning of time.

The Second Intro (guilty):

Now that this essay has offered an introduction, it’s time to offer another introduction. The first one didn’t accomplish what it meant to accomplish because it turns out that moving from dinosaurs to Virginia Woolf’s novel To the Lighthouse is too gargantuan and difficult a task to accomplish quickly.

The Claim:

In fact, in the largest possible sense, whatever this expository essay claims to be about—and it may not claim to be about anything, or it may, or it may do some unpredictable combination of claiming and not claiming—this essay is actually a performance of everything in the world it is possible to do with language, sentences, and paragraphs in a state of complete dissociation shaped only by a hyper-awareness of time (it is due in one hour) and of space (it must be approximately 1250 words long). In other words, this essay suggests, and indeed shows, in ways of which it is itself not conscious, that the scene of the production of its own writing is nothing more nor less than a volatile pressure cooker of radical detachment on a schedule.

#DeansDate #TooReal

-VC

6:02 PM – Marquand Library

Are you seeing the Spring green from your sunlit library window, staring catatonically at your essay prompt, and starting to feel like you’re alone? Well, you’re not. You’re not alone. And you ought to know that. In fact, you are one of many Princeton alumni, both young and old, to have given that catatonic stare to that untouched essay prompt and conquered it, and in 24 hours of time no less. We here at UPC dug up a few vintage photos of Finals period / Dean’s Date from Mudd Library to show you just how not alone you really are.

Here are three to whet your appetite.

Original description: “Dormitory living means taking time to make a point.” Two students studying together in an unidentified dormitory room (1970).

If he did it on a typewriter you can do it on your laptop (Fall 1971).

Graduate student preceptors having a laugh during exam period (1974). This one is not too motivational; more meant to show you that graduate students didn’t have hearts back then either.

Stay tuned for more as the night goes on.

-NDS

5:38PM – Forbes

Stuck on your paper? Skip the Writing Center and consult the Princeton Betch’s list of “25 things that will make your Dean’s Date essay a real winner”:

• Staple a photo of Firestone to your paper and write “Bibliography” on it.
• If assigned a 3,000-word essay, take 3 relevant pictures and print them out. A picture’s worth a thousand words, right?
• Print your essay on materials relevant to your topic. For example, if you’re writing about Moby Dick, print your essay on a whale.

-EL

5:00PM – Frist 247

For the all-nighter is dark and full of terrors.

But never fear, because like some sexy red priestess from beyond the Seven Kingdoms, The Ink‘s bi-annual binger on the Date of the Dean will be the light that guides you through to victory– and birthing some essay-length babies in the process.

Join us for another semester of distractions, tips, goings ons, delirium and better encouragement than can be found in loud capitals on a white poster in Impact font.

Yup, they’re back.

By the way, stay tuned later in the day when The Ink will once again interview the elusive Dean’s Date poster-maker! This latest installment of posters seem to throw less shade than last semester’s, but the vitriol they may produce is palpable.

-VC

Members of Umqombothi, the African a cappella group, invited the family to their upcoming show when they stopped by the group’s booth in Frist. Shyamalan declined, but he chatted with the group for a bit. When Umqombothi members asked him if he directed films, he simply put a finger to his lips and walked away.

Here are some very shady pictures of the director and his family:

Below are close up pictures of the drone:

You can see the 6 horizontal propellers used by the drone to fly. You can also see the lights attached to the drone so it can be seen from far away.

The drone is coming down from one of its flights, getting ready to land on the ground.

Be excited. But be silent.

Among the hundreds of things that prospective Princeton students can do when they visit campus, sitting in on real classes–with real professors and real, live Princeton students!–is up there with finding free food and oversigning yourself on club email lists.

But what if the class listed turns out to be a snooze-fest? (You missed ice-cream for this!) What if there’s some cool, super secret seminar that isn’t listed?

The Ink has identified its top recommendations of classes to drop into for this Welcome Week. Some might be listed on prefrosh brochures– others are not. But first, let’s lay some ground rules:

Prefrosh Classroom Etiquette 101

• Don’t raise your hand to interrupt a lecture larger than 20 people.
• Do reserve your questions for students and professors for after class.
• Don’t attempt to argue with a professor. Don’t be that prefrosh. Just don’t.
• Do (at least pretend to) be engaged.
• Don’t walk in late because you were coming in from another lecture, lest you incur the prof’s wrath, NYU-style.
• For smaller seminars, do ask the professor beforehand if it’s okay for you to sit in. Small seminars are often better for participating.
• Don’t feel overwhelmed!

ECO 100: Introduction to Microeconomics
Instructor: Harvey S. Rosen
Details: Tues, 2:30pm-3:20pm, McCosh 50

Reason to go: Harvey Rosen is a huge deal both as an economist and as a professor — he was Chairman of the Council of Economic Advisors for George H.W. Bush, worked at the US Treasury, and taught Greg Mankiw (author of a popular intro econ textbook and professor at that one really old school in Cambridge, MA) “how to be an economist.” He’s a legendary lecturer, and ECO 100 is highly accessible to all, econ-inclined or otherwise.

Warning: Rosen is a very snarky lecturer — it’s both part of what makes him great and also what scares some students away. If you’re called on or singled out, don’t take it personally or too seriously! He gibes because he cares.

ECO 332: Economics of Health and Health Care

Reinhardt, seen here rocking the Suit ‘n’ Tie CSPAN look.

Instructor: Uwe E. Reinhardt
Details: Monday and Wednesday, 1:30-2:50pm, Robertson Hall 100

Reason to go: Student Course Reviews: (1) “Take this course. If you’re American, take this course.” (2) “As I have told other students before, ‘If Uwe Reinhardt is teaching, ART 106: Watching Paint Dry, I’d take it! If Reinhardt is teaching a class, TAKE IT!” (3) “If you’re not an econ major be prepared to do extra reading on the side or rely on your econ friends to explain some of the economic concepts in the problem sets.” (4) “Overall only take it if you’re looking for a more relaxed course.”

Warning (not really): If anything, Reinhardt remains one of the most quotable professors on campus. For instance, on behavioral economics: “I’m a very risk averse person. I wear a belt…and suspenders.”

AMS 101: America, Then and Now
Instructors: Anne A. Cheng, Rachael Z. DeLue, Hendrik A. Hartog
Details: Tuesday, 11:00 am – 12:20 pm, McCosh 50

Reason to go: You get to hear the perspectives of three professors from different disciplines all talking about the same subject, America. For any patriotic Americans out there, this is the class for you. There’s also a lot of discussion about the evolution of American art, so also a great choice for artists.

Warning: It’s sometimes hard to understand one of the professors and there are often technical difficulties with slideshows.

JRN 440: The Literature of Fact: Narrative Writing
Instructor: Evan Thomas
Details: Tuesday, 1:30 pm – 4:30 pm, Henry House 16

Reasons to go: As journalists, we may be biased, but journalism classes  are consistently among the highest rated at Princeton. Plus, Evan Thomas is a former Editor-at-Large of Newsweek (aka a complete boss) and a great instructor.

Warning: This is a 16-person class so there’s a chance you may not be able to sit in on this class. Write him a email beforehand or go to class early and ask Professor Thomas for permission to sit in.

ECO 363: Corporate Finance and Financial Institutions

Instructor: Yuliy V. Sannikov

Details: Tues, 11am-12:20pm, Frist 302

Reason to go: Preparation for your investment banking summer internship. Student Course Reviews: (1) “If you’re in any way interested in finance (as an academic or want to go to Wall St.), take this course. You will come out with a powerful, practical knowledge of the financial services industry, helpful for interviews, making money yourself, or just impressing people.” (2) “Overall you learn a lot about finance, capital structuring, options, valuation, and you should take it if you are at all interested. (3) “This course should really be offered BEFORE finance interviews, as you’ll know quite a bit of it already if you prepared well for said interviews beforehand. Having said that, it’s a great introduction to corporate finance.”

Warning: (4) “There are better courses you could be taking at Princeton.”

Other popular Princeton courses include:

PHI 306: Nietzsche on Tuesday, 1:30-2:20pm, McCosh 28

POL 240: International Relations on Monday/Wednesday, 11:00-11:50am, Roberston 100

HIS 362: The Soviet Empire on Tuesday, 10:00-10:50am, Peyton 145

HIS 393: Race, Drugs, and Drug Policy in America on Tuesday, 10am-10:50, Guyot 10

SOC 250: The Western Way of War on Monday/Wednesday, 11:o0am-11:50am, Frist Center 302

Happy Prefrosh Week!

After almost 40 minutes of waiting in Maclean House (hopefully this new administration will get better at punctuality) news organizations were allowed into the Faculty Room of Nassau Hall, filled with members of the Board of Trustees and the Presidential Search Committee. NJ Governor Chris Christie was also there, although I noticed him nodding off to sleep every so often (see photos below).

According to Eisgruber, he only found out early this morning that he had been chosen as the president. He will be the first president to have received his bachelor’s degree from Princeton since Robert Goheen, who served from 1957 to 1972.

Some highlights from the press conference in Nassau Hall:

Eisgruber opened by saying “It is a great joy for me to accept this appointment… This university has shaped my life ever since i set foot on this campus as a freshman 34 years ago. That time, as a student, then as an alumnus and a faculty member has given me a heartfelt appreciation for Princeton’s special strengths.”

President Tilghman expressed her utmost confidence in Eisgruber, asserting that ”April the 21st will go down as a great day in Princeton history.”

Eisgruber and Governor Christie shaking hands after press conference. Eisgruber approached Christie to thank him for coming.

Speaking about the importance of Princeton’s financial aid program, Eisgruber said “A place at Princeton is a gift. One that can transform the life of any student, faculty member, or other scholar… we have an obligation to ensure that this gift is fully available to the entire range of people.”

Responding to criticism in newspapers about the worthiness of the high price of a Princeton education, Eisgruber said that a liberal arts education is still critically important to any young scholar. “Not only is a liberal arts degree still an economic benefit,” he said. “[But] the benefit of a college degree is increasing over time.”

Eisgruber, Tilghman, and Kathryn Hall, Chair of the Board of Trustees, sitting at the end of a long table of journalists, answering questions

Calling community-wide conversation “a very good thing,” he emphasized the important of continuation saying that “Princeton traditions are living things. They are constantly being renewed, refreshed, reinvigorated and re-created.”

Governor Christie said that he’s known about the decision since yesterday. Christie also said that Eisgruber “isn’t going to need a manual about this place” since he has been at the University as both an undergraduate and as a faculty member. He also mentioned that President Tilghman has told him that he is one of the governors that has gotten most involved in the University in the ex-officio capacity in which NJ governors sit on the University’s board.

Christie on his phone at the press conference

]]> http://www.universitypressclub.com/archive/2013/04/christopher-eisgruber-83-new-university-president/feed/ 0 http://www.universitypressclub.com/archive/2013/04/21-questions-with-david-remnick-81/ http://www.universitypressclub.com/archive/2013/04/21-questions-with-david-remnick-81/#comments Fri, 05 Apr 2013 19:52:39 +0000 Vivienne Chen http://www.universitypressclub.com/?p=14381 2013 CLASS DAY SPEAKER, PULITZER PRIZE WINNER, AND NEW YORKER EDITOR DAVID REMNICK ’81 LOVES UMLAUTS, PJ’S WAFFLES, AND THINKS TINA BROWN COULD BEAT ZOMBIE LENIN IN A FIGHT. ALSO A HOMEBOY.

Name:
 David Remnick

For those seniors who may have never heard of you, how would you describe yourself?
As a guy who got a D in Russian at Princeton–and then made his stripes…where else?… in Russia. There’s a lesson in there somewhere.

Who’s your favorite Princetonian, living or dead, real or fictional?
Albert Einstein (he counts, right?) and Robert Cohn, the impotent boxer in “The Sun Also Rises.” And some classmates: Elena Kagan, for sure.

Steve Carell, last year’s Class Day speaker, is a hard act to follow. What’s your game plan?
Hire Steve Carell to write my speech.

What’s your greatest guilty pleasure?
If I counted up the hours lost to watching uniformed people tossing, whacking or carrying various-shaped balls on television, I would probably drink hemlock.

In one sentence, what do you actually do all day?
Read, edit, cajole, beg, hope. And that’s not even a sentence, strictly speaking.

What’s the best meal you’ve eaten in Princeton?
Waffles at PJ’s. In an altered state.

What are your thoughts on the future of journalism?
That there is one. Because without real journalism– innovative, aggressive, tough-minded, fair journalism– you’ve got North Korea.

What’s your drink?
I am not very particular.

What’s your personal anthem?
The Miles Davis classic: “So What?”

What makes you laugh?
Almost everything.

What makes you cry?
Death and onions.

Who’s your mortal enemy?
Anyone who thrives on cruelty.

Who would win in a fight, former New Yorker editor Tina Brown or a reanimated Vladimir Lenin zombie?
Tina.

What magazine/newspapers do you read besides The New Yorker?
Too many to name, but, for starters, The Times, The Washington Post, Haaretz, Al Jazeera online, some Russian papers, The New York Review of Books, The Atlantic, The New Republic, Rolling Stone, loads of websites…anyway, a cascade of things.

Favorite New Yorker cover of all time?
Damn near anything by the great Saul Steinberg.

Umlauts. How do you feel about them?
I feel goöd about them.

When’s bedtime?
Midnight to five, five-thirty.

Favorite spot on Princeton’s campus?
The basement of East Pyne, where I (tried to) learn Russian and in various other classrooms scattered around the building, where I got to study with Bob Hollander, John McPhee, Sandy Bermann, Bob Fagles, and Suzanne Nash. I’m pretty fond, too, of wherever P. Adams Sitney was showing movies. And since the drinking age then was eighteen, what you know as a place to get coffee was once called “The Pub.” Trust me, “the Pub” was better. Or so I recall.

Favorite class you took at Princeton?
A dead heat: Robert Hollander’s Dante course and John McPhee’s writing seminar.

What grammar mistake do you find most annoying?
Are you sure that question is grammatical?

What makes someone a Princetonian?
God willing, not an obnoxious question like the previous. What it has meant lately is that you had the chance to be there under a truly great university president. Shirley ruled; she rules; and will always rule. She really set an example on every level.

“It made me laugh,” writes the Prof in pink. (h/t DB ’14)

That said, the student (name redacted to protect dignity) for all we know could have been telling the truth! (Quick! Someone call the Honor Committee! No one expects the Princeton Honor Committee.) At least that’d make him/her honest about the dishonesty.

ORFE Paradise

The Operational Research and Financial Engineering (ORFE) department converted a Sherrerd Hall elevator into a mini tropical paradise. The elevator was complete with beach chairs, flip-flops, and potted plants. The illusion was bolstered by sweet smelling perfumes and a wall-sized print of a beach.

Sad ORFE majors know it’s the closest they can get to happiness until they go to Goldman.

Eating Club Hijinks

Tower
Tower officers announced that the club had moved behind Campus Club, and that the club is holding an all-day meeting that is mandatory for all members. Officers also announced a number of fictional parties and lamented that Franzia had discontinued its varieties of white and rosé wine.

Colonial
Colonial officers stared social relevance in the face and announced that the club would no longer allow freshmen to enter the club to “boost our status on the social ladder.” Another email announcement showed the club buckling to legal pressures and unveiling a plan to turn away students from the club if they are unable to produce a valid driver’s license, passport, or birth certificate.

Terrace
In an email sent to Terrace members, president Neal Donnelly ’14 said that, in light of an inordinately large sign-in class, the club would be retroactively bickering its sophomores. Among other criteria, sophomores would be evaluated on how hard they could chill and their arts portfolio.

A USG Resignation

USG President Shawon Jackson ’15 sent an email to the undergraduate student body, announcing that he was taking a job at the White House and stepping down from USG. USG Vice-President Carmina Mancenon ’14 would take his place, and a new Vice-President would be elected during Spring Elections. Later in the email, Jackson revealed that it was all a ruse.

The Ultimate Housing Prank

On Monday morning, a rather convincing email purporting to be from the Office of Housing and Real Estate Services was sent to the student body and stated that draw times would be reassigned due to incorrect point values. An email sent by Associate Director of Student Housing Lisa DePaul confirmed that the announcement was a prank, and that OIT is investigating the email.

Though the email was sent from opshsg@princeton.edu, instead of the Housing office’s real email address (ushsg@princeton.edu), The Daily Princetonian reported that many students believed the announcement because of technical difficulties during last year’s room draw process.

Yesterday evening, Will Harrel ’13 posted a Facebook status taking credit for the email. This too was an April Fools’ Day prank, and Harrel later revealed that he was unconnected with the housing announcement. In the meantime, the real perpetrators have also taken to impersonating Harrel, and their identities remain unannounced.

Credit: hercampus

Enough has already been said all over the Internet about the letter to the ‘Prince’ editor that Susan A. Patton ’77 wrote imploring us Princeton women to “find a husband on campus before [we] graduate,” because: “the cornerstone of your future and happiness will be inextricably linked to the man you marry, and you will never again have this concentration of men who are worthy of you.”

All I can think about is that scene in My Cousin Vinny, with Marisa Tomei bemoaning to Joe Pesci about her ticking biological clock. Floral jumpsuit and all.

In a reply to NY Mag, Patton said: ”I’m astounded by the extreme reaction. Honestly, I just thought this was some good advice from a Jewish mother.”

On the surface, the letter does sound like she just wants someone to date her nice, Jewish son (Class of 2014 goyim like me need not apply), but it’s more than that.

Patton, newly divorced, says she wishes she had married a Princetonian, because her own ex-husband “went to a school of almost no name recognition” and “had no respect for the hoopla, the traditions, the allegiance, the orange and black.” Meanwhile, I still refuse to do the Nazi-fist in “Old Nassau” because holy shit does this ever look normal?

What’s more, Patton’s own experience with her parents while going to Princeton, which she wrote about in a 2006 Princeton Alumni Weekly article, tellingly reveals something about her current stance on marriage. That is:

[Going to Princeton] was upsetting and shameful to my parents.

I would be the first woman in my family to attend college.  The necessity of my continued education eluded my mother and father. My leaving their home before marriage was an utter disgrace to them. Princeton was unknown to my parents.  They saw no honor in my admission to such a prestigious institution, and they were confident that I should be investing myself in other things.  It wouldn’t have mattered where I wanted to go away to school. They were adamant that a young girl’s place is in her parents’ home, until she is in her husband’s home.  European immigrants and concentration camp survivors, my parents couldn’t understand why at 18 years old, I didn’t direct my efforts towards finding a mate…

The fact that Patton was an emancipated minor, who had to support herself because her Holocaust-surviving parents so adamantly valued her marriage potential over her education, speaks to the struggles and trauma of being a single educated first-generation immigrant woman back in 1977.

Which is why it’s extremely disappointing to hear that the pioneering Patton would re-enact that shame on her would-be daughters with essentially a (slightly more pro-education, but tragically elitist) version of what her parents prescribed onto her: find a “worthy” mate, get married before it’s too late.

“Because these are the best guys,” Patton says to NY Mag. “You’ll meet wonderful men outside of Princeton, but you’ll never have the numbers in your favor the way you do now.”

Or, as Meredith Shiner said it best: “Michelle Obama really screwed up not marrying a classmate at Princeton.”