A towel very similar to the one I was left wearing after fire safety locked me out of my room

I’ve got a bone to pick with Fire Safety.

This is new territory for me. See, I’ve never really had a problem with Fire Safety. Sure, it was a little disconcerting to return to my room last year and find a little note telling me someone had been there, looking through my stuff trying to find anything potentially unsafe or any “obstructions” to my “means of egress.” But since I never painted my room or did anything else to my living space that required much effort, I wasn’t fined, and Fire Safety inspections just seemed like a mysterious but ultimately benign event.

That all changed this morning, when the actions of Fire Safety left me feeling exposed, chilly, and embarrassed.

Here’s what happened:

I was on my way to the shower this morning. I opened the door, shower caddy in hand, to find two gentlemen set on completing the inspection. I was a little nervous, especially since Roommate Steve had performed a few room modifications that may not have been exactly street legal. But I had class, and I had to shower, so I didn’t have much time to worry.

The guys were really nice, and said they didn’t mind at all if I went to shower while they were doing the inspection. One of the pair even looked at the door (which I had unlocked in preparation for the shower) and made a point of asking if I wanted them to keep it unlocked. I said, “Yes, please!” and was on my way down to the shower.

You can probably tell where this is going. I get back to my room to find the door totally locked. Wearing nothing but a towel in the drafty Campbell hallway, I had to knock on my RGA’s door, call Public Safety on his phone, and wait the twenty-odd minutes for someone to come to unlock my room. When the Public Safety officer showed up, he was almost laughing too hard at the sight of me in a towel to unlock my door.

It was an honest mistake, and in the grand scheme of things I was only delayed for half an hour. But they specifically asked me about keeping the door unlocked! Know this, Fire Safety — if I get the email saying that there were no violations during this inspection, then we’re cool, even-steven. But if I find out you’re going to try to fine me after semi-publicly semi-humiliating me, there will be blood. Or at least an uppity email to someone.

(photo credit: http://www.talkinthreads.org/Towels/BlueTowel.jpg)