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Back in the day

Back in my day, I had to walk through a mile of snow to get to the Street.

We have it on good information (well, that’s open to interpretation) that tomorrow is going to be…

Get ready for it…

A SNOW DAY.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in seven years, Princeton will be closed due to heavy precipitation.*

Get your sleds out. Don your mittens. Warm up some spiked cider. It’s time to play.

Or sleep, whatever.

*Okay, technically we won’t be absolutely sure until around 4 A.M., but let’s all cross our fingers. And don’t blame us if we turn out wrong – we’re not controlling the weather machine!

UPDATE (10:30 P.M.)

Alright, we don’t want to rain on any parades that have kicked off since we posted this but… It now looks like the chances of a snow day are slimming.

University emails to faculty are now suggesting the weather won’t be bad enough to call classes off. Sorry guys!

Of course, this is a developing story, so we’ll keep you updated with anymore news we managed to pick up…

Stay tuned to Snow Day? 2010.

(image source: blogs.princeton.edu/aspire)

Keep the faith Pat Forde!

Keep the faith Pat Forde!

Pat Forde, ESPN.com columnist, actually mentioned Princeton in his most recent edition of the men’s basketball column “Forde Minutes”! Not only that, he thinks we could go undefeated this year!

Well, only kinda sorta. He thinks we could go undefeated in Ivy League play, since, at 4-0, it’s still technically possible. But we’d have to beat Cornell twice, who’s also undefeated in the Ivy League.

How does PF Flier (Pat Forde needs a nickname!) handicap the odds? Umm, well, he gives Cornell an 80% chance of going undefeated and Princeton, err, a 1% chance.

Jim Carrey, bring it on home!

(image source: http://assets.espn.go.com/media/motion/2008/1201/dm_081201_cfb_forde_bmoc.jpg)

The Prez.

The Prez.

What’s on Shirley Tilghman’s mind these days?

Besides dealing with a $3.7 billion drop in the University’s endowment (thanks, Great Recession!), Tilghman said at this afternoon’s CPUC (Council for the Princeton University Community) meeting that moving ahead with establishing the nation’s premier neuroscience department is her biggest priority. Tilghman also said the lack of funding to renovate the soon-to-be vacant Frick Laboratory has been worrying her.

The construction of a neuroscience and psychology building below Icahn Laboratory was postponed after the economic climate turned sour, but Tilghman said she’s trying to secure enough alumni donations to break ground as soon as possible. She said the new building is “shovel-ready” and said it was urgent that the University take advantage of today’s historically low construction costs. (Basic Wall Street, y’all – buy low, sell high, you know?) Channeling Sarah Palin, Tilghman said she’s reaching out to a small group of loyal alumni benefactors “to get our ‘base’ energized,” though we’re not sure what this exactly means.

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425px-Queen_Victoria_by_Bassano

If you keep reading, this picture will make sense

You’d think the New Yorker would be firmly in the tank for the ol’ Orange and Black.  Editor-in-Chief David Remnick ‘81 didn’t teach himself, after all.

In recent years, however, Yale has been getting most of the love from this classiest of rags (see here and here and here).  But as long as the stories are as entertaining as this week’s take on the  timeless musical fantasia known as “That’s Why I Chose Yale,” we won’t complain.

A choice passage:

James Goodale, Class of ’55, and a former general counsel for the Times, made it through all seventeen minutes—more collegians bursting into song, accompanied by “Up with People”-style dance numbers, and even some electric-guitar shredding in the art gallery—before reporting that the production seemed “intended for an audience that I couldn’t divine.” He added, “My God, if you’re a hockey player, you think, I’ll go to Princeton.”

In other New Yorker-related news, apparently Princeton Politics Professor Gary Bass sometimes writes in to give his opinion on current cinema?  Most random New Yorker blog post about one of my former professors EVER…

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Free, and apparently epicly terrible

Free, and apparently epicly terrible

Anyone noticed the shrink-wrapped box sets littering dorm hallways, mysteriously titled “Wild Animus”? We did, and our fancy was struck, so we decided to do a little digging. What are these bizarre boxes? How did they get here? And what do they want with us?

We took to the information superhighway in search of answers. Our first stop was an old blog post by a fellow truth-searcher, one Robert Nagle of the blog idiotprogrammer. It turns out Wild Animus’s author, Rich Shapero, made his fortune doing something with technology and decided to use his fortune to publish and give out free copies of his book.  Over time, he’s added CDs and other media to create a sort of immersive literary experience (an experience someone recently decided Princeton students needed to have).

But here’s the thing: apparently, the book sucks. Like, really sucks. Here’s a collection of reviews from around the web:

“Deficating [sic] onto a page does not count as writing a novel.” – anonymous, idiotprogrammer

“This is easily one of the worst books I have ever read.” – Patrick Burnett, amazon.com

Worst book ever.” – cade, goodreads.com

And, to be fair, a slightly more positive review:

I haven’t read the book yet, but the spoken word CD series is worth a listen to anyone interested in psychedelics or survival journeying or vision questing.” – Janto, idiotprogrammer

So there you have it. Apparently this thing has gone global, with people receiving and ignoring the book in Europe, North America, and possibly Asia. But since Princeton students have so much time for pleasure reading (and a vibrant psychedelic community), I’m sure “Wild Animus” is going to catch on here in Central Jersey. Or, you know, not.

(image source: http://www.richshapero.com/images/store_boxset.png)

The inimitable Peter Singer.

The inimitable Peter Singer.

Enjoying those orange-and-black-bedecked water bottles you just stocked up on at late meal? How about that latte you just bought at Small World? Or those cans of shaving cream you just invested in to spray all over residential college hallways during pickups?

Well if so, check out these great lines from a profile of Princeton’s very own Peter Singer, professor of bioethics extraordinaire, that was printed in Melbourne’s Sunday Star-Times.

“The money you spend on these luxuries, he says, is money you have not given to help the wretched of the earth. You are, he suggests, like someone who refuses to wade into a pond to save a drowning child because he doesn’t want to ruin his new shoes. Death sits at your cafe table, and will not go away.”

Ahem. How does that latte taste now? Want to go collect that shaving cream and reuse it?

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Before today, the only time I’ve given much thought to the whole “boo-hoo Princeton toilet paper sucks” controversy was when I was deciding who not to vote for during USG elections.

But then I stumbled upon this 1930 ad for Scott Toilet Tissue (click the picture to enlarge):

4322687998_579a35b5ac_o

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Holder Hall

Holder Hall

It snowed! Or rather, it’s snowing… a lot. According to our ruler, we’ve received about six inches of snow so far. Which means … snow day!!! Oh, wait, it’s Saturday. And Princeton doesn’t do snow days for a measly six inches. Cass Cliatt, Princeton’s spokesperson, tells us that campus has only closed three times due to weather conditions in the past 15 years. So let’s not all cross our fingers too soon.

(Although we would recommend calling if you’re going anywhere on Nassau. We know Labyrinth’s closed today, and Panera’s got weird hours, so save yourself a snow-trudge and call ahead.)

Still, it’s an impressive amount of snow. The historic blizzard is sweeping from Virginia to southern Pennsylvania and central Jersey, leaving as much as two feet of snow in some locations. We can’t expect that much, but we’ll get a few more inches before the day is over.

Between this blizzard and the epic storm that hit in December, we concede that winter does exist in New Jersey. We may get more snow and have far chillier temperatures in my native state of Michigan — but New Jersey can still hold its own.

And did anyone notice that all the walks and stairways were magically plowed and shoveled by 10:30 a.m.? The easier for you to slip and fall, guys!

In his NYT blog column today, Economics Professor Uwe E. Reinhardt described what would happen if Princeton were run more like the current health care system. Reinhardt said that unlike the piece rate payment model of health care, which pays physicians for each unit of service provide, universities operate with prepaid packaged deals, where one annual tuition fee covers “all the pedagogic services going into the education of the student.” Here are some of the changes Princeton would undergo were it to operate less like prepaid H.M.O. plans and more like piece rate compensation plans of the our health care system:

  • Rented Office Space: Unlike our current inegalitarian system of delegating office space—which sticks assistant professors with offices in the bowels of McCosh, while proving tenured professors with pristine, wood-engraved fireplaces and windows overlooking the chapel—this system would allow all professors an equal opportunity for renting space from the university. They would use their spaces as the “their own profit centers,” finding ways to charge students for visits.
  • Senior Thesis Consultation Fee: That’s right. Under this new system, all those advisor meetings you’ve been delaying would cost between $150-300 (fee varies by student). Those office-hour visits you use to score points with preceptors would take on a different tone, as each visit sends home a bill to mom and dad.

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from matthewzapruder.files.wordpress.com

from matthewzapruder.files.wordpress.com

So there’s this thing called the Prox Hop.

Maybe you’ve seen it. Sometimes the prox is in the front pocket, and sometimes it’s in the back pocket. But it inevitably requires an awkwardly lifted leg, some bump and grind against the wall, or in my case, a running start.

And now, lucky Inkblots, you can hear me do the prox hop!

Last semester, my friend Aku Ammah-Tagoe ‘11 interviewed me for a radio piece she was putting together for her audio journalism class with Dan Grech ‘99, a Press Club alum and a former reporter for Public Radio’s Marketplace. Specifically, she recorded my running start, jump and the successful beep of an unlocked door. The show the class produced, called Back Story, will be airing on WPRB on Feb. 7 and 14 at noon.

From the PAW:

“Princeton students have plenty of inner conflict — there’s no shortage of drama here,” Ammah-Tagoe said. “But also there are great stories [about] people who are doing things that are unexpected, interesting, surprising, and really cool.”

Individual stories will also be posted on the Princeton Alumni Weekly’s blog here. What you can expect besides my prox hop adventures: a dramatic tale of SAE hazing, sprint football’s losing streak and Smashcraft Heroes.

My favorite quote, from the SAE story: “So the stripper takes the belt, and she just, you know, beats me.”

You don't mess with these guys: Muldoon (center) with his rock band, Rackett. [source: www.myspace.com/rackett

You don't mess with these guys: Muldoon (center) with his rock band, Rackett. [source: www.myspace.com/rackett

As Cornel West receives his fair share of air time for his outspoken criticism of Obama, it’s worthwhile to remember that our favorite snazzily-dressed Tigertown celebrity has some pretty stiff competition for the coveted position of Princeton’s most intriguing faculty member.  Case in point: Paul Muldoon, whose roles as a professor, poet, and rock band leader were highlighted in this great profile piece from the Worcester Telegram.

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When Ross Ohlendorf ‘05 isn’t pitching for the Pittsburgh Pirates, he’s raising longhorn cattle at his family’s ranch. And when Ross Ohlendorf ‘05 isn’t raising longhorn cattle at his family’s ranch, he’s interning at the U.S. Department of Agriculture or giving interviews to Sports Illustrated. Ross Ohlendorf ‘05 does not mess around. Clearly.

Ohlendorf’s duties (after his morning workout) range from branding to feeding to measuring horns to naming the calves to photographing animals for the ranch’s website. It’s not always pretty, he says while searching for Big Chief: “My arms were covered in manure this morning.”

The Pirates’ ace spent the first two months of his off-season in a very different job, one that smelled a lot better and required him to wear a shirt and tie. He was an intern for the United States Department of Agriculture in Washington.

An ORFE major who rocked the SATs (shoutout to my College Confidential homies) and apparently served up a blistering thesis, Ohlendorf put his skills to the test “doing cost analysis of regulatory programs that identify and trace diseased animals and plants.” What now, A-Rod?

One of the cattle in his herd is named Big Chief. Ross Ohlendorf, you are our Big Chief. Keep juggling your absurd achievements — keep making us proud.

The many faces of Ross Ohlendorf:

All Business

Face #1: All business

Face #2: On the Mound

Face #2: On the mound

Face #3: Down and dirty (Technically his dad, but whatever)

Face #3: Down and dirty (Technically his dad, but whatever)

(image sources: http://assets.nydailynews.com/img/2009/11/28/alg_ohlendorf.jpg, http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2008/03/12/sports/12yankees.span.jpg, and http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/images/200909/20090906wp_ohlendorf_500.jpg.)